Surprised and Humbled

As most of you know, I have been sick on and off as I have been in Guatemala. In this time I've had to ponder, I have realized something so important: this trip was and still is for me to learn and grow as much as it is for me to pour into others. As a matter of fact, I think have been more poured into than I have poured out in the month that I've been here.

In some ways it feels like I just got here a few days ago, and in other ways it feels like I haven't been in the States for a really long time. I have been in Guatemala for a month as of today, and I can't be more grateful for my trip here. Many of my friends took off for South Africa yesterday, and I hope that they have as full of an experience there as I have been having here.

Today I was praying on my way to school, and God spoke to me in His usual, quiet voice. You see, I wasn't particularly looking forward to class today because the kids are always really bad for Teacher Jorge, and they don't usually listen to me very well when Sully isn't there. He said, I don't need you here, Katie. You need to be here. There is work that needs to be done in you and through you. It doesn't matter if you want to be here for the next three weeks. Your attitude should be the same because you are serving Me.

So, here's to having an attitude that screams "I'm serving my Savior because I want to and because it is what's best for me and those in my life." I've been on an emotional roller coaster as far as missing home and loving it here--from wanting to leave and never wanting to leave--but as I look back, I know that this trip is a huge blessing to ME. I am hoping that my presence is a blessing to others, too. I know how to love, and I hope these kids see Christ's love in me. I hope that my presence in La Verdad y La Vida encourages others to go out into the world to spread the good news about Christ. I'm learning so much PATIENCE here...with myself and with others. I'm learning how to receive GRACE and to give it. It's not easy by any means, but I know it's worth it.

I know this trip is worth the countless number of times I've said "I miss you." It's worth not being able to flush my toilet paper. It's worth the flu. It's worth the tears. It's worth the strange-tasting milk. It's worth the millions of black beans. It's worth it all. I love this country, and I love the people that I've met here. My family in Christ has been just that--a family. I couldn't ask to be taken care of better. I couldn't ask for more encouraging or caring people with me. I know that this blog isn't extremely detailed, but I hope that you know that I'm safe here...because the Hands that hold the World are holding my heart...even here. I hope you know that I'm learning, and I really hope you know that I'm growing. I'm not who I was...Thank God. :)